WHY BALAME THE VICTIM (UMMITA AND CHINESE SUSPECT SAGA) By: Auwal Tijjani

A Foreign National of Chinese origin murdered a Nigerian lady in Nigeria for refusing to marry him, this headline alone without going into details is enough to draw sympathy towards the victim and the bereaved family.

But sadly, while right thinking Nigerians condemn the act in strong terms, amazingly, others were blaming the victim for her travails and fate. 

Let's assume as widely peddled that the murderer made alot of financial commitments towards the deceased Ummita and her family which is quite normal in every relationship because it was his choice, was that enough reason to slaughter her? Ummita has the intention of marrying quedong but her Uncles decided to turn down his proposal probably on the basis that he is not a muslim. 

Sheikh Daurawa recently revealed that the deceased has disclosed to him that quedong has reverted to Islam and yet that wasn't enough for her Uncles to verify and consummate the marriage to avert this disaster. 

I am sure her Uncles are aware of this long relationship but did little or nothing at the early stage to put an end to it, we should be blaming her Uncles and the Murderer, and not the deceased or the victim's mother.

It's appalling how some people disgustingly resorted to drag the deceased and her family over this unfortunate incidents which ordinarily a saned minded reasonable Nigeria would have a deep thought over it before being judgemental or arriving at unnecessary conclusions. 

Ordinarily, we should be angered by the audacity this foreigner has to even contemplate the murder of a Nigerian in her own country, not just that, in her matrimonial home inside her room, (not minding whether he bought the house or not) to be frank those blaming the deceased and the bereaved family are not being fair at all.

In my opinion, the idea of blaming the deceased and dragging the family of the bereaved especially the Mother is worst than the crime committed, and this is a clear manifestation of the absence of patriotism which is fast becoming a habit, Not all relationships end in Marriage.

This attitude of blaming the victim is gradually becoming a norm among a particular group of people, we've witnessed how victims of banditry were blamed for their odeals, while negotiators are eulogized as heroes, even the criminals who committed this unsavoury act are believed to have emerged as a result of government neglect thereby justifying their behaviour.

In the same vain, it is this same group of people who opined that the DSS is victimizing Tukur Manu, coming up with trump of charges just to smear him when all facts suggest he has a hand in the series of kidnappings and has received share of ransom paid by families of kidnapped victims.

It is these same sets of people with uncommon mindset who blame ordinary Nigerians for the current woes the country is facing, exonerating those saddled with the responsibility to fix the mess in the country.

It will be difficult to salvage the situation of this group of sadist and paranoid people because their situation is irredeemable but we shouldn't stop praying for them to get healed for their shortsighted philosophy about life.

We must learn to appreciate single mothers, they've faced and seen alot, the task of single handedly training and nurturing a male or a female child to adolescent these days is not a day job, very few Uncles help these days once a woman loose her bread winners, societal neglect of widows and orphans is becoming so rampant and we keep accusing them and blaming them of every wrong doing in the society.